Cancer Story

I want to say first that we have already raised over $200.00 at the Rhea Lana sales and the doors do not even open to the public till today at noon!! Yeah!!

Last night, I watched "My Sister's Keeper" for the first time. I was not real sure I wanted to because I knew what it was about and yes I cried for the whole movie. But it got me to thinking about my own cancer story. The girl in the movie used humor to cope and so did I because it is either laugh or cry and I prefer to laugh. So I did make jokes that only my dear family and friends thought were funny and I did make light of the whole process because I didn't want to drown in it.

I have a few stories from the hospital that I did not control that I look back on now and laugh at. I do not actually remember a tremendous amount from those morphin induced visits. Some of the stays were fuzzy and I was admitted to the hospital every other week for longer than I wish to think about. Some of these visits were fun and others were because I had mouth sores from the chemo that were covering the surface of my entire digestive system! Those are the ones I don't remember alot about. However, I do remember the balloon that my little brother brought for me. It was a butterfly that was jointed at the wings and when you pulled on the string it looked as if it was flying! Through the morphin, it really did look like it was flying and looked real. I remember thinking that a huge butterfly was in my room and it was soo pretty!

I had roommates at the hospital very infrequently because the smell of food made me puke. But the one time I did have a roommate, she was a blast and around my age at the time. However, she scared the pee out of me one night! It was around midnight and I got up to use the bathroom. I groggily dragged myself to the bathroom pulling my IV pole along with me. I turned on the bathroom light and when I turned around, I screamed at the top of my lungs. Everyone came running. My roommate had taken off her prosthetic leg and propped it up next to the commode. I didn't know she even had a fake leg! It looked so real. She laughed her butt off and so did everyone else. To this day, I think back on that and laugh to. I asked about her a few years ago and found out that she had had a relaps and this time didn't make it. I cried and cried...that could have been me. But GOD called her home for a reason and had other plans for me.

I remember the only night that my mom left me alone at the hospital. It was so cold outside. I had an outside room at the hosital so I had a wonderful view of the capital all lit up at night. I woke up to a freezing cold room. I called the nurses and told them I was freezing. I think I had to call back again to tell them to hurry. When the nurse finally made it to my room and turned on my lights, we were both shocked to find that the window had blown open. I was 3-4 stories up and the windows were not suppose to open! They didn't have screens or anything. If my mom had been there, she probably would have hit her head on the window when sitting up from her uncomfortable little couch bed. They had to move me to another room so that maintenance could come in a fix the window. They don't know how it happened. Only to me would that happen!! My mom never left me there alone again.

My mother stayed by my side the whole time. She was with me for every visit till I went to college and then I went by myself if I didn't have any major procedures. I love my mother dearly. She is my best friend! I learned how to be a great mother by watching her. She is one of the reasons I made it through everything. She was holding my hand through every spinal tap, bone marrow, and the bags and bags of chemo therapy. I couldn't have asked for more. I have been blessed with a wonderful family and support system.

My family is very excited about our adoption and have been supporting us in every way. My oldest brother is designing the "I Support Adoption" t-shirts (he is a graphic designer). Tony and Kim have donated clothing and toys for Rhea Lana and have helped with ideas on promotion of our game. We receive prayers from all.

I want to say "I love you" to my family.